When is enough to much????

john lilly

john lilly

PR Addict
Here's my question and thoughts? My son and I have been in MX, I believe for four years now. He's 13 so by motocross standards we were a little late to the game but he does well and we have a good time doing it. However, the deeper we get into the sport the more time it takes away from my wife, daughter and my personal time (which my personal time I'm ok with). It also seems to cost more each year, as he rides the bike harder and obviously gets more seat time which equals more things wearing out (this is understandable also). So, while I know this is a personal choice, I wonder when enough is to much. Since being around this sport, I have heard of people draining their 401k's for their child to ride, I guess in hopes of them becoming a pro some day, I have heard of others who have sold their wives jewelry and other keepsakes and then seen people who have had some personal hardship and start to ask others for money so that their kid can go race that weekend and the examples go on and on. To me it would seem that in all these cases that maybe the person would take a break from racing until they could truly afford to race, am I wrong, maybe I am. While this sport brings families together and I'm all for that but, in some of these cases maybe this type of behavior is tearing families apart. What are we teaching our kids, if you want to do something go ahead and don't worry about who we are hurting or stepping on or the consequences of our behavior? Shouldn't we be teaching our kids that they can't always get everything they want. Should these kids ever have to hear the word "no"? I think there is value in the word "no" and something that later in life these kids better get prepared to hear. By giving them everything they want are we really preparing them for their future? Are we giving them the tools to handle life after motocross, or are we just setting them up for failure when they think everything they want should be handed to them? Yes, I like the competition of motocross and quite honestly have fallen in love with the sport even with all the cost (time and financial) that go along with it including the chance of substantial injury and possibly death (I'm not really ok with this stuff but understand it is a possibility). But again is the approach to spend every last dime (beg, borrow and steal) and possibly be a burden to my child later in life when I am destitute? Or what if my child has a serious injury where they can't take care of themselves, will I be able to handle that responsibility and everything it encompasses? I don't know that there is one right or wrong answer to this question and I know it is a personal decision but I see a lot of these older kids who seem to struggle transitioning from mx to work life and 99.99% of them will have to get regular jobs if they want to support the next generation of riders . I also understand that maybe this might ruffle some feathers because the majority of us truly sacrifice a lot to participate in this sport but I thought it might be a topic that some of you that have been at it longer than me could give me some of their views. Btw, I haven't personally attacked anyone so if I'm describing some of your behaviors please don't attack me just give me your views. Thanks!!!
 
Any hobby that cost you your 401k or selling personal items is not healthy.
If your making a choice to go for it at all cost to be a pro then that is a risk reward decision.
As far as working I think MX riders do have a good work ethic. I don't believe the transition to working if MX but rather the persons habits.
As far as family time being lost that is a big issue with me . I try to be aware of time spent and spend quality time away from Mx .
Just my 2cents
 
Your post asks many questions so I'll try and give a well rounded answer. Based on your child's starting riding age he's not planning a career so just have fun and enjoy the time together it will be gone before you realize. If it interferes with the wife and daughter take a step back and ride less and do something they enjoy a couple days a month. U don't need to get a new bike or gear every year and if you set a budget for riding expenses stick with it. Give the boy chores or make him get good grades to ride so he learns to appreciate his contribution to your guys hobby. Geez this was supposed to be a short answer...
 
Year after year I see all these people spending ungodly amounts of money on stupid items just to impress the other. (I guess that is why they do it) they run out and buy two bikes, 3 or 4 sets of gear, 5 pair of goggles, 2 pair of boots and a couple helmets with custom paint of course. Then we get to the bike. Well it has to have $500 wheel sets. $2000 in suspension $1500 in engine work. $500 pipe. $400 triple clamps. And my personal favourite $200 titanium foot pegs. They buy $50,000 motorhome. $5000 trailer. And so on, and on... WHY?
This sport can be done on a budget. You don't need any of that crap. Race 2 or 3 times a month. On a stock bike. In last year's gear design that you buy at the end of the year. Drive your pickup to the track. Run one class and set on the tailgate and enjoy the time with ur son.
The time end of things will also fix itself. Just racing a few times a month leaves plenty of time for the rest of the family.
 
Unfortunately, ck1racerx some of what you said above does describe me and some does not. However, I think the most important word you said was "budget" and that is something, I think I am going to have to do this year.
 
Too far? Try building a Briarcliff because you love the sport so much.....you haven't gone too far yet......once you hit the BC level.....then you have a problem.
 
He still loves it but I get burnt out by the end of summer. I'm not broke but it's a lot of $ I could put towards college or paying my house off early!! Just some thoughts outside of dirt bikes.
 
The one thing that you mentioned over and over in your post was the cost of the sport. Seems that is the biggest issue. I've seen the people that have spent money they don't have on the sport. Those people are stupid! Knox hit the nail on the head. You seriously don't have to spend some of the money people think they have to spend on the sport. If I don't have money to pay for racing, guess what, I would be staying home! No sport, whether it is motocross, cheerleading, football or baseball should cut into a families budget for the important things in life.
 
Good post John. All of us in the sport struggle with these issues. With regard to family, as you know, I grew up in the sport. It was truly a family event for me growing up. I have wonderful memories, especially with my dad, that I cherish. I hope that one day my son looks back and feels the same. With all of the negatives we can highlight about the sport, there are a lot of positives also. With regard to family time, my son knows that we simply can not race every weekend. On our race weekends, my wife and daughter sometimes go and sometimes they do not. When they do, we make it a family "camping" event. We'll stay the night, camp out, make a big fire, cookout and just relax and have fun. On our off weekends, tell the boy you'll take him to practice on Sunday and then take your wife to a movie on Saturday night (this has worked great for me...happy wife, happy life). With regard to cost, no doubt an expensive sport but we know we are only doing this for fun so we try to be smart about it. MX is a lifestyle but putting food on the table, paying bills, saving for college/retirement, etc all come first. Then we get to spend on our toys. Just remember, there is an opportunity cost no matter what you do. As my wife always says, life is short and we aren't getting any younger. If you love it, do it. I know guys that spend way more at country clubs every year than we do on MX. If we weren't doing MX, we'd be doing something else...and that would also cost money. It's kinda like the commercial...MX bike, x dollars, racing every weekend, x dollars, gear, x dollar....the good times and memories..priceless!
 
Maybe a poorly chosen example, but the underlying theme is dead on. When it stops being fun, then it is too much. The memories are what your investing in. I just hope I don't get Alzheimer's. Pardon the interruption, carry on non track owners.
 
I've been down this road. My son raced BMX. We traveled all over the world, and I'd do it all over again. We were gone every weekend for around 10 years. Some trips it was my son, wife, and myself. Sometimes I couldn't get off work so it was just my wife. The point is time spent is priceless. I knew what my son was doing on the weekends, unlike a lot of parents with kids his age.
If you child is committed give them 100% of your time. It won't last forever. You'll find a way to clean your house or mow your grass.
As for the money issue, set up a budget, yes make sacrifices, but sacrifice things like partying, bar hopping, cigarettes. Not this weeks groceries or electric bill.
I've seen fathers get so consumed they lose their jobs. Or give up a good job to work for peanuts in the industry. Just remember, do what you can afford, involve the entire family, and you may have to postone your racing to further your sons. But you'll have plenty of time to race again.
 
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As far as work ethic goes, I think it can go both ways and directly is reflected on the parenting... I've seen plenty of kids growing up that had everything handed to them... well... MOST (not all) of them are not really doing much with their lives. Not that they are doing bad but, they arent doing anything special.

I used to HATE going to the track in our pickup, seeing all of the motor homes and new bikes and stuff... and I feel bad because my dad did the best he could to get me to the track. It did cause a lot of family problems.. and hell I was never even good lol... but when I was younger i probably did a lot of bitching and probably made dad feel pretty bad that he couldnt give me all of those things. BUT... looking back I wouldnt change a thing. It taught me very important lessons about life.. about working for what I have. Now I bust my ass so that I CAN go buy new bikes and $500 pipes and 4 sets of gear.... As soon as I was at the age that I could start doing any kind of work to help pay for riding, I was.. and since then it was made very clear to me that if i want something that I had to make it happen myself. it was also a great parenting tool. I knew if i screwed up in school or doing anything else stupid w/ friends or anything... I wasn't going to get to ride. It kept me away from parties and drinking and all of that.

Even now, if I wasn't riding, I'd probably be a bum. I'd half ass my 40 hour job, come home and do whatever. I wouldn't have the motivation to put in another 10 hours on a side job every week or whatever... I'd probably just get fatter too because what else would i care if i was a little out of shape.

Only you know if/when it might be time to step away or step it down a notch.
 
john lilly,
If you can, get your hands on the November issue of Motocross Action magazine. On page 92 is an article titled "Life Cycle of a Pro Racer". It speaks to some of the very issues you brought up.
 
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the way i look at things and even chatted with McDade about last week, what if the kid or yourself werent racing. What would you be blowing thew money on. Clothes, toys, game systems, etc etc etc or even worse, DRUGS..... ive seen plenty of people who give up on something and take the wrong route to get the same sensation they got from racing. I personally know someone who quit racing and took up drugs to get their "high" they used to get from racing. Now im not saying all racers/riders are that way by any means. I race at the age of 23 for fun, will i ever make it pro? 99.99% no lol. But i do it for the enjoyment, to keep me outta trouble and to be around a great group of familes and friends.
 
ck1racerx said:
Year after year I see all these people spending ungodly amounts of money on stupid items just to impress the other. ...This sport can be done on a budget. You don't need any of that crap. Race 2 or 3 times a month. On a stock bike. In last year's gear design that you buy at the end of the year. Drive your pickup to the track. Run one class and set on the tailgate and enjoy the time with ur son.
The time end of things will also fix itself. Just racing a few times a month leaves plenty of time for the rest of the family.
Click to expand...

Preach it, brother...
 
I think a lot of riders and people lose perspective of the realistic expectations of the any sport. And I kind of blame somewhat of this on the parents and industry, basically they're selling a false-dream. Some are very lucky and talented, and some simply won't get there. I attribute this to the mindset like 'I'm not going play high school football unless I have a opportunity to play in the NFL.' Kind of short-sided.

I was a good rider, wasn't great. I realized at a teenager age, that a career racing a dirt bike wasn't realistic. But that being said, I really didn't want a career on a dirt bike, because your career ends at 35 years old (if your lucky) so I got out of the sport what I needed. I raced as a local A guy in Kentucky and Tennessee and made cash, I did unsuccessfully try some Pro Nationals which was a goal for me at the time. Between racing as a local A rider, doing rider schools, and being a co-owner of a motocross promotional company, (plus a side job from time to time) I completely paid for my college degree (graduated with no debt). My dirt bike gave me a life and career.

Now I'm in my late 20's, I working in the industry I enjoy (some days), I have a CRF450 and YZ125 (my 2 favorite bikes) in my garage, looking to buy a house with some land (to build a mx track), meeting some cool, smart people all over the country, good relationship with my family, good health. Simply from one thought process... I dig dirt bikes. It's fun for me.

I believe there is nothing wrong with attempting to compete on a elite level (Loretta's, Pro Nationals) but don't forget about grassroots racing and life beyond racing. If a dirt bike brings you enjoyment and being at the track on the weekend makes you happy, then why are we talking about money?


Alex Hunter
 
NQ1965 said:
john lilly,
If you can, get your hands on the November issue of Motocross Action magazine. On page 92 is an article titled "Life Cycle of a Pro Racer". It speaks to some of the very issues you brought up.
Click to expand...
I did get my hands on that article and had my son read it to me, "great article" and thanks for suggesting it. Also, thanks MX153 for letting us borrow your magazine!!!
 
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